Another Church in Kyiv....

Taken also around January 2007.

Glad I Went

So, thank you Sue, Ed, and Christa for telling me to go.

It is back in the running and now ahead of the other place I will have a second interview later this week.

And then there is one other second interview at the end of NEXT week. The trick is to make sure that no one gives me an offer before the beginning of the second week of March, when I might have a more accurate picture of what is going to happen.

I am happy to apparently have options (although who knows if any of them will actually HIRE me) but also confused as to how to proceed. I've never really had to make a decision like this before that would bind me in a way that I might grow to resent later.

So, when choosing a job do you:
1) just go for the one that offers the most money
2) where you would feel the most comfortable
3) where you would have the opportunity to grow the most professionally
4) best benefits/vacation/work hours
5) where you could have the highest position (say a Director instead of a Assistant Director)
6) any combo of those?

Tell me what you think...

Photos from Country of Service: Kyiv, January 2007

I often forgot how beautiful and contradictory Kyiv is while I was in Ukraine. I had the opportunity in January of 2007 to view her as a tourist, which was quite frankly the ONLY time I really enjoyed being there. Perhaps this was because being accompanied by someone paying for everything assuaged the wallet some. Kyiv is very expensive and it is impossible to find a hotel for under $20, which to a PCV is a LOT of money.

These two photos illustrate the two faces of Kyiv. One shows the beautiful St. Andrew's church, located on the equally beautiful cobbled stone Andriyivsky street. There are some beautiful architectual masterpieces in Kyiv, especially in regards to the gorgeous Orthodox churches that paint the landscape of this busy city. This church was made by Bartelomeo Rastrelli, who also created the Winter Palace in St. Petersburg.

The other photo is of Rodina Mat, the Nation's Mother statue, also affectionately known as "Tin Tits," who stands before the Museum of the Great Patriotic War in all her Soviet glory. In her own way as beautiful as Rastrelli's church.

They show the contrast between the Orthodoxy and grandeur of a tsarist empire and a People's Republic, uniform in design and thought. I think that Ukraine is still trying to find herself somewhere inbetween these two things, as they both encompass her rich and often times confusing past.

While I did not serve in some place as exotic as most PCVs, I did get a front row seat to witness the devastations of Communism and the idealism of it too. It was the unique opportunity to watch a country grow, develop, and shape its identity right before your own eyes. She has learned to crawl, but it is time to see in which direction she walks.

Peace Corps Week

It was 48 years ago when President Kennedy challenged a group of students from the Univeristy of Michigan to devote several years of their life to living abroad in developing countries in an effort to stave off communism. And with that speech there was an overwhelming response that made the Kennedy campaign staff realize that they were on to something... In the year that followed, Kennedy received more mail about the "Peace Corps" than any other subject. It was evident that something about this idea resonated in the minds and hearts of young people across this country.

Since its inception almost 200,000 people have served in the Peace Corps, in over 100 different countries across the globe.

I am proud to have been one of those people and to have known so many others who have given of their time to live and work in conditions drastically different than that of their lives in the United States in order to learn something more about the world we live in and about ourselves.

The toughest job you'll ever love? I don't think that it was that tough; challenging at times, but never "tough," however I certainly did love it and would do it all over again.

Boston Area RPCVs can celebrate this week by attending a different ethnic restaurant each night of the week. They have tried to incorporate each area of the globe where the Peace Corps has served. It's a pretty great idea and I plan on attending several nights. I believe on Saturday that there is a service event, but as I will be continuing my work as an ESL teacher on Saturday, I won't be able to attend.

It is nice to know those community members of this group are actively pursuing ways of keeping in touch and meeting up with others who have answered this unique call to service.

Decision Made

After soliciting advice wanting to justify not going, I decided to go.

Everyone was saying "why not" so why not?

What Would You Do?

So...

I currently have three jobs that do not allow me to make ends meet.

Despite this, I decided to pursue only positions that I believe will challenge and interest me. One of the jobs that I interviewed for does not necessarily meet those criteria. It is a entry level sort of position that would allow me the opportunity to get my feet wet and after a year or so, move onto something else. The university is a nationally recognized one and has a wonderful reputation. So it scores high on professional development. However, I am 99% positive that this is not the kind of job that I would wake up every morning and be excited about. Actually, I can guarentee that I would pretty much *never* feel this way about this job, although I don't think that I would loathe it, and again, it would provide professional development for transitioning into a different department at a university. I also don't know the pay.

They called today and left a message asking for a second interview to meet more people. My heart is telling me to just tell them no, but my head is thinking that this might be my only option...

I do not mind though working harder at the temp place, making arrangements for a longer position and/or investigating other opportunities for money that will secure me until I find SOMETHING THAT I LOVE.

I just wonder how smart all this is.

Advice, please? And can it come before say noon tomorrow?

Redefining Goals

In the course of a week my ideas of work has changed rather drastically.

Whereas before I was applying for anything that sounded vaguely interesting, I have decided to curtail all jobs unless they are the sort that will get me out of bed in the morning.

This certainly means that I'll be unemployed for longer than I would care to be, and that I'll probably have to call the temp agency and ask for a longer assignment in order to be secured money (currently this week they have nothing for me, so I've been having to work more hours at the fundraising place, which I am pretty tired of). But I think that it will be a worthwhile investment at the end of the day.

I have also opened the door for work outside of Boston. While I do have a lease here until the beginning of August, I can get out of it and probably, since the price is so cheap, find someone to assume the rent if I did leave.

This has got me thinking about going abroad again, although I think that I will hold my horses until the summer for that if nothing materializes stateside.

We do have internet at the apartment now and I can post pictures, so as soon as I can get some extra cash around I can start developing my film. Until then, I've got tons of pictures from Croatia!

Korcula, Croatia (I think)

More pics from Croatia

Not PC

And by PC, I mean politically correct, not Peace Corps.

Yesterday, after being asked for money for the umpteenth time, I realized that homeless people are the new gypsies.

I understand that some are mentally ill, facing challenges that I should be lucky that I don't have to face, but dammit, just leave me alone and stop asking me for change.

More Homeless Adventures

On Friday night at a laundromat near the grocery store, I was with a friend and we were doing our laundry where the only other person there was a homeless man who spent most of his time talking to himself.

After awhile, the man approached us, when our backs were turned and started up a conversation of sorts. He told us that he had no place to go, so he stayed there until the cops came and took him away. It's cold, he kept telling us, and too cold to sleep at night on the streets.

I asked about various shelters that he could stay at, and he indicated that they were no good. He spoke very softly, so it was hard for me to completely understand what he was saying.

What I did understand was that he has been living on the streets for years and that he was afraid of what he would do to himself. He told us a story of how Satan (I believe it was Satan) came up to him and told him to commit suicide by drinking car battery acid and told him where to go and do it. He did and was rushed to the Somerville Emergency Room. There they asked him why he did such a thing, and he just told them that he didn't know, because he knew that they'd think that he was crazy if he told him that Satan told him to do it.

It must be awful to have enough sanity to realize that you are slipping away.

At one point in time he made the exclamation "oi, oi, oi" in addition to several phrasings in English that American speakers do not use. He sounded just like my students in Ukraine. A kind woman came in and had bought him some food from the grocery store next door and said, "here Vitaliy." So, when I got the chance I asked him where he was from in Russian. He was confused and responded some stuff in French. I asked in English and he told me Russia. I asked if he spoke Russian, and with a small light in his eyes he threw back his head and said in Russian "of course!" and we conversed briefly, but he switched almost immediately back into English, saying that he has an easier time expressing himself in English now.

Before he left to go and find some basement to sleep in, he left us with some advice: "People create problems for themselves, they fight, argue, drink, and so on. Don't create problems for yourselves." He reiterated this several times, about the importance of not creating turmoil in your life.

I have seen others fall into the hole that Vitaliy warned against, and it is very hard to pull someone out of that hole who can't recognize the problems that they are creating for themselves.

But I suppose that one day, like Vitaliy, they'll discover that a lot of the unhappiness that they have was created only by themselves. The trick is to realize this problem before you get to the point where he is and that in many ways, no one is immune.

Coming Home Soon!

Somewhere, flying overhead today, over the Atlantic Ocean and touching down in the heart of Texas in the evening, is the last member of the cluster-link, along with her new Ukrainian husband.

I wish her the best of luck in her own readjustment, and patience in dealing with her husband's potential culture shock. We are here for you, Christa.

And yes, calling a landline from a cell phone does not create any more expensive charges, and we can still chat "for free" regardless of whether or not you have Life:) and I have DJuice. They sell in minutes, and nights and weekends are usually free.

I can't wait to hear your voice Stateside.

Interview City

Well, good news finally has come my way this week. I got no fewer than 6 phone calls about wanting to interview me or give me a position (tutoring ESL part time). One job was part time, which I didn't realize, so that I won't be interviewing for that, but the others I have scheduled to either begin or interview. I have three over today and tomorrow and one in a few weeks.

While obviously interviewing does not mean that I have gotten the job, it does mean at least that people are interested in what I have to offer, which means that something, somewhere is out there.

Two Dollars A Day

...is impossible in the United States. My transportation to work is more than that one way. Crazy.

The Non-Profit Job Fair

Yesterday BU had a job fair along with the Idealist (check out their web site) and I only went to meet the Peace Corps folks.

The room was packed with Boston area non-profits and schools and I glanced around looking for the recognizable logo. When I approached the table there was already a line of folks interested in hearing about Peace Corps. When I was asked if I was a student, I told her that I was an RPCV. Probably the first time I've introduced myself as such! After she was done answering questions for the individuals interested, we chatted for a bit and when I told her that I just got home, she kind of laughed and said "yeah. It's gonna be hard. But you have to persevere. It just takes a long time."

If that's not an upbeat way to start a job fair, I don't know what is.

Transients and Crazys and Connections

These past few weeks have been sobering in a lot of ways. I've been temping with an agency and I've been fortunate in my only two placements: one at a distance learning university and the other at a non-profit that provides health care to homeless folks. The work is by no means satisfying, but it is work and I understand the importance of what they are doing.

In coming back to the United States, I have grown accustomed to thinking of myself as a "transient" since I have never stayed long enough in one community to consider myself a part of it or to establish roots there, so in ways I've found it amusing to work with a very transient population: the homeless. It also made me behave a bit nicer than I would have when a homeless man came and sat next me to last week at a Dunkin' Donuts while I was waiting to start my other job at a fundraising company and started making conversation:

Him: Miss! Excuse me miss! How are you today?
Me: (looks down at hot chocolate)
Him: Miss! Can I sit here miss!
Me: (looks up to make sure he is in fact speaking to me) Sure.
Him: Miss! How are you today?
Me: (shrugs shoulders) Okay.
Him: Just okay?
Me: (nods)
Him: Excuse me, miss, are you married?
Me: (what is this guy, Ukrainian?) (Shakes head to indicate no)
Him: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: (shrugs shoulders--note: it's a confusing time on all fronts of life)
Him: What?
Me: I don't know
Him: What do you mean you don't know? Did you fight or something?
Me: (shakes head no) What about you? Are you married?
Him: No. I haven't found the right lady yet... I keep looking.
Me: (shakes head yes, looks at watch) Well, I gotta get to work
Him: Oh yeah, where you work?
Me: Um. Down the street.
Him: No, what do you do?
Me: Uh. I, uh...I um... Make phone calls.
Him: You're a telemarketer? What do you sell?
Me: I, uh, don't sell anything.
Him: No? What is it that you are doing then?
Me: We fundraise for different causes.
Him: What kinda causes?
Me: You know, progressive ones.
Him: Okay, pretend I'm on the phone. (holds hand to ear like he's on the phone)
Me: I'm embarassed.
Him: No, please Miss, give me your speil.
Me: No, really, it's embarrassing.
Him: PLEASE Miss! Please! Give me your speil.
Me: No, really, I'm embarrassed.
Him: Look, I won't even look at you, I'll look away (moves body and turns head)
Me: Hello, I'm calling on behalf of the DNC..
Him: (interupting) The WHO?
Me: The Democratic National Committee...
Him: (interupting again) The Democratic WHAT?
Me: (trying to be as quiet as possible) The Democratic National Committee. Would you like to renew your membership for $100?
Him: Sure!
Me: Okay, now I have to read a bunch of other stuff. (Gets up to leave)
Him: No, what kind of stuff!
Me: Are you a US citizen or permanent legal alien?
Him: Yeah.
Me: This money is not tax deductible, and there is a lot of other stuff, I should go.
Him: Okay.
Me: Well, have a nice day!


While this whole scene was completely and utterly embarrassing for me (if I arrive early, I always hit up this DD for hot chocolate and this man was unbelieveably loud) it made me draw a few comparisions:

American homeless people are everywhere and make conversation with ordinary folks, usually asking for money or just wanting to make small talk, like this man. In Ukraine, people who were destitute were usually little old women who could not live on their miserably small pensions. They would typically hang around churches or busy parts of town, sit on their knees, put out a small jar and a picture of some saint and pray or sing or call out "help me, girl, help me please, give me some money" as you pass by. There were also disabled men who would do the same, and one who even started calling me a "little hare" which is not anywhere near as sweet as you think it is. But they didn't bother to make this kind of small talk like the man who spoke with me at the Dunkin Donuts.

Also, in truth, I did not notice as many homeless people in Ukraine. The homeless in American cities are about as common as rats in the T, and that folks, is a lot. (Which also makes me want to note that I NEVER saw a rat in any metro stop in Kyiv, St. Petersburg, or Moscow and those places are all colder than Boston..) It has left me wondering why. It is true that famial ties in Ukraine are 90 times stronger than in America. Someone would be found to help take care of you. Or, perhaps you'd just drink yourself to death. Perhaps because we are also so accustomed to living with so much, that when you find yourself in a situation where you can't afford any of it, the small things you do have just slip away from you, and quickly. Of course then there are other reasons, mental health and addiction being a major one, I doubt that America has that many more crazy folks or drunks than Ukraine. And of course, if people are "different" in Ukraine, they usually aren't seen in public at all, but housed away--but I guess you could make the argument that it's better to be locked up than on the street?

Also, it made me a lot more anxious. I talked a little bit about what happened once I got to work and my supervisor just looked at me like I was the crazy one. "I know," I replied, "I'm a sucker..." But it's just that it's easy to ignore someone when you literally don't understand them. It's hard to see what is going on all around you and understand it and still not want to be human and respond.

It makes me wonder as a society if we have become desensatized to homeless folks...